One more car memory....

 All this talk about new cars has got my memory cells working in overdrive. I'm reminded of the time I challenged a co-worker at the grocery store to a drag race. He was a pompous, snot-nosed, spoiled, perfect complexion, well-rounded personality type that none of the rest of us could stand. He had his pick of any of the girls he chose to date without losing a drop of nervous sweat over the possibility of a rejection. He was the guy we loved to hate. His name was Ray Bands.....I kid you not. Oh sure, he probably adopted the "Ray" from Raymond or some other ill-fitting nomenclature but the name stuck. Ray Bands was at the top of his game in the year 1967 when all the rest of us were still trying to figure out what it was that made girls run in horror from us if we showed them the least amount of attention.

I still don't remember what weird feeling came over me the day Ray was at the store on one of his many days off, showing off his newest purchase, a baby blue 1957 Chevy, two door hardtop, 327, 4 speed on the floor.....mint....not a scratch or flaw of any kind. It was the car I had dreamed of whenever I wasn't dreaming of the lovely Melba Peach from sixth grade miraculously walking into the store wearing her Hurst Jr. High cheerleader outfit even though we had left junior high behind years before.....I'm sorry, where was I? Anyway, I couldn't stand it that he had everything he ever wanted....he had probably even dated Melba Peach at some point in the past. During his rundown on the overall qualities of his new purchase, I had all I could take. I said to him, "Ray, it's pretty and all but I just bet I can beat you on a quarter mile drag race!" 

Let me say at this point in today's story, I'm reminded I have already told you all about this race. You remember of course, Ray laughed at me and my 1953 Studebaker, six cylinder, 3 speed on the floor conversion. Laugh he might...but I happened to have driven my dad's 1960 Bonneville to work that day. Having accepted my challenge, we walked out to the parking lot where I quickly left Ray and his puny little 327 in the dust. I never told my dad I had raced his Pontiac so I am still alive today to talk about it. Ray never spoke to me again, which was not a problem for me but he also stole my girlfriend du jour to put me back in my respective place on his imagined social ladder. 

This is just another story about other people's cars. I personally have never owned anything worth talking about but I can sure brag about all the cars others in the family have owned. I won't do that though. I'm a humble sort of guy.

The Car....

 I 'need' a new car. Oh, I know I don't really NEED a new car, but I want a new car. I haven't bought a new car in seventeen years. I did receive the gift of a newer pickup several years ago from my son, Cody. He got tired of worrying about me driving an ancient, rusted out pickup with 300,000 miles on it and insisted on replacing it with a nearly new Chevy Silverado, which I will never be able to wear out in this lifetime. He's a good little boy. Anyway, I still need a new car because the FAMILY car which Debbie drives and occasionally wrecks is in  need of replacement. We bought it new in 2007 and figured we would get a few good years out of it. Debbie wrecked it three times over the years and still picks up a ding or two about every time she gets out. It has over 100,000 miles on it but still runs like new. I've never had to pay for anything on it other than oil changes, tires, and a battery or two. I've never even done a tune up on it. It just runs and runs....and I'm sick of looking at it. Nobody drives a car for seventeen years. It just isn't done! Why won't it die?!?! Debbie loves her little car and gets nervous whenever I talk about getting rid of it. She just doesn't understand. I need to see something new parked in the garage. Something with more bells and whistles than her little Kia Sportage has would be nice. Something with some safety features like those available on newer cars like backup cameras, lane change alerts, and "hey you crazy woman, you're about to hit that car in front of you" alerts. And, I don't care what Debbie says, when we finally shop for another car, I am going to have the final say in what we buy. It will probably be our last new car and she's picked out the last two we've bought over the years. I want something really nice.....I always thought a Caddy would be a nice retirement type car but there are so many other classy cars on the road I'm open to suggestions. I will not buy another boring little economy thing with silver paint and tiny little wheels. I want a real car!!! 

Growing up in the 50's and 60's was so simple. The dad would decide what to drive. He would shop for it. He would care for it. He would never allow the wife to control the use of it. It was the FAMILY car. He would faithfully wash and wax it and then trade it for a newer model every two to three years. That's how it was done. There were no other family vehicles unless you lived on a farm and needed a 'plain-jane', six cylinder step side (pickup) to go from farm to market. This vehicle would never be sold or traded in. It would be used until there wasn't another mile left to be driven in it, at which time it would be parked in the corner of a nearby pasture to rust away into oblivion. The family car though was special. It told the neighbors of the success and wealth of the owner. It always gleamed in all it's shiny chrome and vivid colors. It would never be driven more than three years because the new models always had so much more to offer and successful families did not drive old vehicles unless times were really bad. Even then, the family car would be replaced occasionally just because.....you know, just because!!

Nowadays, all the cars look the same. One year all of them are silver, one year they're all gold, some years black comes back into style but there are never any flaming red or bright yellow cars introduced. And, all the cars look the same....similar to a bar of soap going down the road. No one actually has just one car either. There is the "family" car, driven by the mom and occasional frustrated teenager. The dad always has his own "work" car. In most cases there are "the kids" cars, and some really upscale families have "for fun" cars. These are usually off road, funky, and all utility. Every family needs one. We don't have one.....

Growing up, we were toted around in big, powerful, fancy cars. They weren't always new but they for sure always looked new. Driving around in a dirty car was just....well, it was just not done. The first car I remember was a 1950 Chevy, mint green with a dark green top. This was replaced with a 1955 Pontiac Star Chief, two door hardtop with all leather interior. It was a beauty and a joy to be seen in. After that, we went with a 1960 Pontiac Bonneville. This was our first four door model because with five growing kids there was a need for easier loading/unloading. After that came the 1965 Chevy Caprice. This was the car I got to "borrow" for dates. My dad really loved this car and drove it until he bought a 1972 Chevy Impala, two door hardtop....fancy! He kept the Caprice for his "work" car and only drove the Impala on special occasions. The Impala was eventually replaced with a sleek new Buick Regal. I think this was around 1976 but I'm not sure. It was a beautiful car....quite impressive, but a piece of junk. It never gave us anything but grief and was soon traded in for another big honkin' Buick of some type. I have lost track because by this time I was married and taking care of my own "family" car. My dad continued to buy Buicks until the day we had to take the keys away from him. His heart was broken and he insisted the Buick be parked where he could look at it when he wanted.

I never kept the tradition of trading cars every few years. If I had something dependable, I would drive it until it was no longer dependable then drive it down to Mr. Wright's used car lot and sell it to him for next to nothing. That is how I wound up in the situation I'm in now. I have a seventeen year old car that I'm sick of looking at. It has no value at all. I hate to think of making car payments again, especially since Debbie is still in her destructive driving mode. I could be content with just the Silverado sitting out there. It is one nice ride but I can't imagine letting Debbie drive it. If she would just agree to give up her driving license we could be a one car family. I would get rid of the Kia and have lots more room in the garage. Our insurance rates would be much better because Debbie keeps an up to date accident report on file. The insurance lady told me the only way I can lower my rates is to take Debbie's driver's license away. That would be nice but I'm afraid I would get tired of having to take her for all the woman type stuff she does.....shopping, meeting friends, etc. As much as I would love to be rid of that boring old silver Kia Sportage, I guess it will have to do until it dies and leaves Deb stranded somewhere. Then we go car shopping!!!