Been Cruisin' Grand Finale

Let's pretend today is yesterday. Now let's pretend I didn't forget to post yesterday's post. Let's pretend I didn't take a long nap instead. Okay, I feel better now.

If you'll remember, our four travelers have left the hotel and headed for new adventures aboard the Explorer of the Seas. We enjoyed our short stay in Seattle. Debbie even got to use a gift card she had been saving for a Seattle Starbucks. She and Nancy wandered into one of the seven thousand Starbucks shops to order coffee. Debbie ordered a caramel, cinnamon, deluxe, super-duper Frappuccino and handed over her card. Nancy ordered next and decided on the same thing. Debbie was feeling generous so she handed her gift card to Nancy and said, "hey, this is on me." There was twelve cents left on the card. Okay, back to the cruise.

After an hour and a half working our way through lines we were finally able to board the ship. Here we were told our rooms wouldn't be available until 3:30 in the afternoon. It was suggested we walk around the ship or get a bite to eat at one of the many restaurants. We decided to try the Windjammer restaurant at the top of the ship. Lugging our carry-on luggage behind us, we found a bank of elevators and squeezed into one of the cars. We soon discovered everyone who had boarded ahead of us were doing the same thing. Windjammer is a buffet style, all you can eat eatery. Evidently the mindset on this first day is to see just how much a person can eat on the first day of a cruise.

We finally found an empty table and left Debbie with all the luggage while we worked our way through the various feeding frenzies. The experience wasn't at all what we expected for a classy cruise. It was more what one might expect on a college campus 'free food' day. After we polished off our 'light meal' we asked an attendant if there might be a place we could leave our luggage for a few  hours. He politely recommended we leave them in our rooms. It seems our rooms had been ready for us before we boarded.

As I mentioned in the first part of this story, our rooms were very nice. 'Plush' is the word that comes to my mind. Of course my mind had conjured up an image of a steel tank with a bunk bed. After enduring muster, which is a mandatory meeting of all passengers aside their pre-assigned life boats in order to scare the bejeebers out of us, we were free to "start the party". We were all tired so we went to our rooms for a nice long nap. Party on dudes!

We decided we would avoid Windjammers and try out one of the classy restaurants for dinner. We were assigned to a table next to the windows, in a corner with two very efficient and pleasant attendants. Carlito introduced himself as our headwaiter who would be assisted by Rommel. He took our drink orders and was pleased when Nancy ordered a bottle of semi-expensive wine for herself and Mike. Debbie and I ordered iced tea which immediately told Carlito we were the lesser half of the group. Moments later Rommel arrived at our table and introduced himself as our headwaiter assisted by Carlito. Rommel read off the chef's recommendations and left us to decide. We decided the chef was either sadistic or insane. We chose our meals from the menu. Carlito brought us an assortment of breads while we waited for our meals. When time came for dessert Rommel brought out dessert menus. We each ordered something different with plans to share. When the desserts arrived I made the mistake of saying, "Oh man, I wish I had ordered that". Rommel took off and returned with a second dessert for me. A classy guy would have chuckled and said, "Ah, thanks Rommel but I don't really need a second dessert". I said, "Wow, thanks Rommel! Can we do this every night?".

Nancy had to sign a tab for the wine she ordered for dinner that first night. She felt she had been given great service from Carlito so she added 20% gratuity before handing it back. She didn't realize the cruise policy is to automatically add 18% gratuity to any purchase made on the ship. Carlito was thrilled with his 38% tip and gave Nancy especially good service the entire week. In fact, he appeared to be so fond of Nancy we considered trying a new restaurant out before the week was over.

One more mention of food on the cruise then I'll move on. I went to the Windjammer early one morning to get a coffee. I found the frenzy to be over and folks were acting human again. I sat at a table by myself and watched people come and go. An elderly woman walked up to the table next to mine with her little granddaughter in tow. She told the girl to sit and wait while she went through the line for their breakfast. She asked if the little one had any special requests. The girl said she wanted bisgetti and milk. As her grandmother rolled her eyes and walked away the girl held up a finger and yelled, "Make that chocolate milk". I don't know...I just found that to be humorous

Our first stop on the cruise was Juneau. A lovely city with lots of charm. We were scheduled for a whale watching tour so we didn't get to see much of the city. What we saw made me want to move to Alaska. Debbie said no. The tour into the fjord was cold and choppy. I prided myself on being the only member of the group not needing a motion sickness pill. I hope to add a couple of photos here to show at least one of the many humpback and orca whales we saw. I doubt I will be able to because I am naturally incompetent and lose most photos I try to post.

We were thrilled to see so much beauty around us and experience whales closer than we expected. The guide told us we were lucky too to see humpbacks and orcas swimming together since orcas normally eat humpbacks. I think we would have been darned lucky to have seen that. The whale watching was probably the highlight of the trip for me.

Our second stop was Skagway. This little town had more jewelry stores than I've ever seen on one street. It seems the tourists who arrive for three months out of the year really like jewelry. We took a tour to the top of a summit, the name lost in my defunct memory bank. The tour guide was funny and filled us with more history and stories than we could possibly remember. The highlight of this tour was the bear that came right up to the road. The guide stopped the van about twenty feet away so we could get pictures. As we were parked there a car pulled up and a woman jumped out and ran toward the bear to get a close up. We heard the guide whisper to himself, "here's your lunch!" Luckily for the woman her fast approach startled the bear and he ran off. I loved Skagway and the people living there. It was a really laid back town. I told Debbie I could live there. She said no.

Our last stop was Victoria, British Columbia. This is without a doubt the most beautiful city I've ever seen. We took a tour of the city and fell in love. It is so clean and remarkable we were spellbound. Debbie took pictures nonstop until her battery finally gave out. Pictures couldn't possibly do justice to the beauty of this city anyway. Victoria is situated in a "rain forest" range. Because of its location anything will grow there. The temperatures year round are between 58-78 degrees. We enjoyed high tea at the historical Empress hotel while watching people stroll the streets. I told Debbie I could easily live there. She said she thought she could too if we could convince our sons to move the grandkids up.

I know I've gone on too long about this trip. You may be thinking, "Good grief, I hope he never goes on a European river tour". If I do I promise I won't go on and on about it. This trip was special because it was on Debbie's bucket list and because I dreaded it for so long. I was so impressed by it all that I felt the need to share. We are going to the Caribbean next week. I promise I won't tell you anything about it.

Been Cruisin' Part Two

As we sailed along the coasts of Alaska and British Columbia I wondered how my meager words could describe the beauty all around us. On one occasion I was so overwhelmed by the spaciousness and awesomeness of it all that I began to tear up. Yes, it was truly that beautiful....and since I am not a man of many words and knew I couldn't do justice to what we enjoyed I was very thankful to see my wife Debbie's Facebook post this morning. She spent a good portion of last night downloading and commenting on about seventy-five photos. Had I known my wife of forty-five years was an accomplished photo journalist I would have provided her with a quality camera. What she recorded with her cell phone and tiny little pocket camera was amazing. Rather than try to describe the beauty, why don't you go to Facebook and view her photo album? It's worth the effort.

In the meantime, I will do what I do best...relate the odd, and sometimes humorous things I saw and heard during the cruise. As I said before, we had a day and night in Seattle before our ship sailed. I loved Seattle. We stayed at the Grand Hyatt in the middle of downtown. We walked everywhere. I think if I lived in downtown Seattle I would disobey my wife, doctor, and sons and go buy myself a neat little scooter to get around. Debbie wasn't in favor of wandering too far from the hotel as the day wore on so we settled on a restaurant next to the hotel. We did not know until the bill was brought that we had picked the most expensive restaurant in town. I hope to have my personal loan in place before that credit card statement arrives. As we were leaving the restaurant we asked the waiter if he could suggest a good place for breakfast the next morning. It just so happened that since his establishment was right next to the hotel, management felt it prudent to offer a breakfast buffet. Not to be offensive but to hold on to enough money to finish our trip, we asked for an alternative. He gave us a suggestion with location which we thought sounded good. Debbie and Nancy were tired and wanted to go to their rooms but Mike and I decided to walk for a while and find the little recommended café. It was two blocks away on Union Street. We walked.....and walked....and walked a little more before giving up and returning to the hotel. We thought maybe we would find Union Street and the café the next morning.

The next morning we started out from the hotel with two starving wives. They had all kinds of confidence in our ability to hunt and secure food. After walking for half an hour and passing several eateries offering the breakfast we sought, their confidence began to lag. It became apparent to all that we could not find Union Street or the neat little café we had been told about. We decided to go back to one of the earlier choices but evidently made a wrong turn. No little eateries anywhere. We eventually went to the Chamber of Commerce building because we did find it. We thought maybe they could help us out. They did. They pointed out a little snack bar down the hall that served "the best coffee in Seattle". Our quaint breakfast in Seattle consisted of premade pastries and coffee in Styrofoam cups enjoyed amid the quiet ambiance of the reception hallway of the Seattle Chamber of Commerce.

After breakfast, we were supposed to meet our shuttle at 10:30 at the taxi area in front of the hotel. We were there early. The shuttle wasn't. We waited a good while inside and then another fair amount of time pacing the sidewalk outside the hotel. No shuttle for us. Finally a well dressed gentleman walked up to see if he could help us. Debbie explained our situation. He asked for our copy of the shuttle confirmation. Debbie, in her calm and efficient manner screamed, "WHAT CONFIRMATION?!?!!?" It seems our confirmation had been slipped under our hotel room door during the night. Debbie, in her calm and efficient manner, had noticed a piece of trash on the floor and threw it in the trashcan. Had it not been for a very understanding and courteous driver, our ride to the ship may have been fairly quiet. As a side note, as the shuttle pulled away from the hotel and made one turn we found ourselves on Union Street.

In order to keep at least a couple of readers from falling asleep I will stop here. Tomorrow I will tell a few things of interest....my interest anyway....that I saw and heard during the cruise.

Been Cruisin' Part One

I've lived for 65 years and never once felt the need to get in a boat, whether it be a rowboat or a huge ship. I have given in to peer pressure and gone out on ski boats with friends occasionally and actually got out on skis once. Awful experience...absolutely awful. Debbie has been pushing a cruise on me for years now and I've always been able to avoid it. After I retired though, Deb got busy and planned an Alaskan cruise for us and it finally came to fruition last week. I did not want to go and planned to make life miserable for any poor soul I encountered along the way. Everyone kept saying, "Oh, you'll love it...you'll be hooked...you'll want to go on more...". I was not convinced. Finally, Debbie called on help from my cousin Mike and his wife Nancy. They are seasoned travelers and agreed to make the trip with us. It was nice to know I would die among loved ones.

We left DFW Airport early one morning and flew in to Seattle, Washington. I had always wanted to see Seattle so I agreed to go that far. We had a wonderful day there touring the city, sampling great food and drink. We visited the Pike Marketplace and went by the original Starbucks. I say "went by" because our plan to go inside for a cup was thwarted by a line reaching halfway down the block. Our hotel was beautiful and made even better because it was a gift from our son Cody. The boy has good taste in hotels. I kind of enjoyed cruising so far....

The next morning we loaded up and headed for the pier. As we drove up I saw this mammoth ship rising from the water up to...well, I don't know where...it was absolutely huge. My first comment to Debbie was, "I'm not getting on that thing!" She laughed...I was serious. Things began happening so fast though that before I knew it I was committed. The cab pulled up, everyone piled out, bags were grabbed, taxi driver was paid, and the groundswell of people joyfully lining up to meet their doom encompassed us and away we went. By the time I found my senses I was in a long line waiting to get to another long line that led to security checks, that led to another long line that led to the ship. It was mind-numbing which I figured was necessary to get most first-timers on the ship. After a grueling hour and a half we made it to our room. I was impressed. I expected steel walls and bunk beds and maybe a little porthole to watch the ocean rise and consume us. What I found was a beautifully decorated place with king size bed, carpet, nice amenities, and a very nice balcony from which to fall into the ocean and drown.

I was still feeling uneasy about the situation until Mike and Nancy talked me into exploring the ship. I thought it would be best to sit in our rooms safely belted into our seats while the ship was actually moving but Debbie coaxed me out for the walk. I was amazed. We were in a floating city. An hour into the cruise I had forgotten I was actually in a ship. By the end of the day I was on the top deck checking out every view I could see. I wanted to soak up every minute of the experience of sailing. The wind blowing across the deck, the clouds moving about as the waves slowly moved below was more than I ever imagined. The feeling of being alone on an ocean stretching out as far as I could see in any direction left me humbled and so thankful for the opportunity to appreciate a yet unseen part of God's creation. We were one day into the cruise and I wanted it to never end.

Tomorrow's post will give more details. For now, we're home. It's hot and humid. We're asking ourselves why we continue to live in Texas. I would get back on that ship today if I could.

Uncle Frog

If you are blessed at all, you have a favorite uncle. I don't care how wonderful your uncle may be mine is better. No one, except for about a hundred cousins, has a better uncle than mine. Frog was my mother's little brother. He was single when my memories started and he lived with us on three different occasions. The first time was when I was just a few weeks old and my dad was invited to join the war in Korea. Frog moved in to help my mom with one baby and one toddler. Unfortunately I didn't keep good notes back then so I have few memories of his stay. I do have one memory but its probably because the story has been told to me. I'll pass that story on later.

The second time Frog lived with us we were living on Sam Calloway Road in Fort Worth. One of the things I remember most about living in this house is Frog teaching my cousin, Mike, and me to smoke. As a side note, Mike is my cousin and best friend. We were born within three days of each other and together learned most of everything we ever needed to know. Mike and I equally idolized our uncle Frog and we had a huge appreciation for his willingness to share his vast knowledge of things our dads thought we were too young to know. At the advanced age of four, Mike and I were ready to smoke like every adult we knew.

I remember that day as if it were yesterday. Frog was sitting on the couch enjoying a good cigarette break. Mike and I wandered in from fighting Indians and bad guys and climbed up on the couch on either side of him. Purely out of a sense of discovery we asked Frog what cigarettes tasted like. He said he couldn't explain it. We would just have to find out for ourselves. I thought that would be the end of it because I knew Frog loved his cigarettes and was reluctant to share. Mike had a more inquisitive nature and continued to pester him for a valid answer. It never took much to wear Frog down. In about three minutes he produced a cigarette out of his pack for each of us and kindly lit them up before handing them over. The three of us had barely settled in for a good smoke when my mom walked into the room. You would have thought we were doing something dangerous or wrong the way she reacted. I don't know if my aunt Ramona ever knew that Mike got a spanking from my mom. I do know both of us got a severe beating and Frog would have got one too had he not been just a shade faster than my mom getting to and out the front door.

Mike and I gave up smoking after that. We saw no sense in getting beat for doing something that made us want to throw up. Uncle Frog is gone now as are all but one of my wonderful aunts and uncles. The Lord did answer our selfish prayers though and uncle Frog lived a good long time. He never changed....thank you Lord!!

Tree Surgeon? Can I hear a "Quack Quack"?

Well, I tried to add a photo but it appears I'm a bit...uh, stupid. I have no idea where my pic went but trust me you would have laughed. I few weeks ago a crew of "tree surgeons" came through our area. They had been hired by the power company to trim branches away from power lines. Nice idea and proactive but I might suggest hiring someone who actually knows how to trim trees before this happens again.

The photo I hoped to include showed a tree down the road from us which had been "trimmed". It had been a beautiful shade tree at one time. Now its....well, its indescribable. This same desecration occurred all around the area. Some areas look like war zones. A drive down Glade Road used to be a pleasant trip under mature oak and elm trees. Now its more like driving down Kindling Row. Its a sad scene which I will try to avoid for a couple of years.

I happened to be on my patio the day the surgeon made his way to my back neighbor's place. He had a huge tree which I've never been able to identify. It has, or had, about eight trunks coming up from one spot. It was weird but pretty. It shared its shade with us at certain times of the year. When the job was completed the tree had morphed from a multi-dimensional piece of art to a two-dimensional abstract. I hate it. While the job was going on I walked out to discuss the job with the surgeon. Unfortunately, he no hablar ingles. I started to talk to him using my vast Spanish vocabulary. I explained to him I had no problem with the job he was doing other than he was destroying my neighbor's tree. I made suggestions like "leave that limb alone", "if you have to take that limb, cut it at the trunk and not six feet out", and lastly, "touch any of my trees and I'll shoot you". While I was speaking, the man's supervisor walked up behind me. I turned and asked him if he thought his employee understood me. He spoke to the employee in Spanish and got a response. The supervisor then told me, "yes sir, he understands you would like to order a large chicken burrito, rice and beans".
I guess it has been a while since I've used my Spanish and could probably use a refresher course. I explained to the supervisor that I didn't want any of my trees touched by his butchers. I said it in a nice way of course. He explained he had to trim away anything closer than six feet to the power lines. I got out my tape measure and checked my trees. They passed my yard up and continued their carnage further down the road. I'm still heartsick over the damage done to our beautiful trees but thankful I had trimmed my own trees a few weeks before these guys showed up. Maybe I can bid the contract with the power company next time.

Haunted House on Elm Street

I've told this story many times but have never taken the time to write it down. It's a true story. The events are as I remember them. Some of my siblings remember different things in different ways but these are my memories of the haunted house on Elm Street.

We moved into the house in 1955. It was new and in an unfamiliar area. My long life of five years had been spent in the River Oaks section of Fort Worth. This new house was way out in the rural town of Hurst, Texas. The first several years in the house held no surprises for us so its confusing even today how or why the haunting began. We know exactly when it began though.

Daddy had been transferred to Roswell, New Mexico in the early sixties. He was with a team of men responsible for the electrical wiring of the underground missile silos installed to defend our country against the evils of the Cold War. Rather than sell our house in Hurst my parents chose to rent it out in case we wanted to come back to it some day. They rented it to three college girls and off we went to our new adventures. After the project was completed in Roswell, General Dynamics decided my dad was needed in San Diego. Because of five young children and a Texas born and bred wife, he declined the transfer and moved us back to Hurst. The renters still had a few months left on their contract so we moved into another rent house a few miles south of there. When the lease was up on our old house we moved back in. It was soon after this move we were introduced to the ghost.

Mama was the first to see the ghost. It was a Saturday afternoon late in the summer. We had wrapped up the weekly yard care and house chores and had cleaned up to go shopping for school clothes. All of us were piled into the 1960 Pontiac and as we backed out of the driveway mama told daddy to stop the car. She had left her purse on the dining room table. She hopped out of the car and ran up to the side door of the house. This door opened to the dining room which was next to the kitchen. As she stepped up into the house she froze then quickly slammed the door and ran back to the car. She told us someone was standing in the kitchen. Daddy got out and told us to stay in the car and lock the doors. He then went to the side door and stepped in. He was gone for what seemed like an hour but was surely just a few minutes. We didn't know what to expect...maybe a burglar running out the front door with daddy in hot pursuit. Eventually the side door opened and daddy stepped out carrying mama's purse. He had checked the entire house and found nothing. Mama was sure she saw someone but when asked to describe the person she couldn't even tell us if it had been a man or a woman.

As the years passed the ghost appeared to mama several times. She would never see enough of it to describe but she did determine the ghost was a woman. Her sightings were always in the kitchen or hallway. She occasionally found pictures moved on the hallway walls. One evening while standing at the kitchen sink she felt she wasn't alone in the room. She felt a hand gently rest on her shoulder. She quickly turned to see.....nothing. The feeling of a presence was still there but nothing more. None of the rest of us saw anything until 1968. We had all heard various sounds over the years but no sightings. The sound I remember most was kind of like a television set off in a distance. You can hear it but can't understand what's being said....does that make sense? I heard this for years late at night. The first time I saw anything was during one of those "sounds". Unlike before, the sound began to rise in volume until I woke up enough to sit up in bed. I looked out my bedroom door and saw a pulsating light in the hall. The sound increased and decreased in volume as the light pulsated. After a few seconds the light faded along with the sound. I would have written it off as a dream had it not been for our conversation over breakfast the next morning. I started out the story with, "Now don't any of you laugh but let me tell you what I saw last night". I then described to the family what I had seen the night before. Glenn laughed at me and Cindy rolled her eyes but my mom set her coffee cup down and said she believed me because she had seen it too.

Not long after the pulsating light thing, I started having nightmares. The dreams were always the same. The television sound would start down the hall and all of a sudden someone would grab me by the ankles and try to drag me out of bed. I would wake up holding onto the headboard and scared half to death. I didn't tell anyone about this though. I didn't normally have nightmares but they were just dreams....nothing interesting. Then one night the dream started again. The sound started and I felt the fingers wrap around my ankles. Just when the pulling would normally start, the music stopped and the fingers went away. It woke me up and as I sat up in bed I saw a woman sitting at the foot of my bed. I started to say something...probably something stupid, but before I could say anything she smiled and slowly faded from sight. I never had the dream again.

As all of us kids grew up and moved away mama would occasionally mention seeing her ghost. I had long since decided my own experiences were brought on by some medication I must have been taking but mama was persistent. The ghost was real. She had seen "her" so many times she could describe the clothes she wore. Her stories were so regular I began to feel a little bit creepy when I would come home to visit. In fact, I was checking on their lawn one summer night while they were away on vacation. It was hot and I was craving a glass of cold water. I hated like everything to go into the house alone....at night....in the dark...but a cold glass of water on a hot August night sounded just too good to pass up. I went in and turned on the lights in the kitchen, opened the refrigerator and got the cold water. I poured a glass and stood at the sink sipping on it. I felt someone walk up behind me and place a hand on my shoulder.....I am not making this up. I just got goose bumps remembering it after all these years. I never turned around to see who my visitor was. I dropped that glass and ran for the door as fast as my legs would carry me. I never spent another minute in that house by myself.

The last couple of years my folks lived on Elm Street the ghost didn't make any appearances. I asked my mom one day if she had seen "her" and she shook her head 'no'. She said she kind of missed her, too. A few months before my dad passed away we were sitting together at the nursing home talking about old family stories and such. He got quiet at one point and seemed to ponder what he was about to say. Then he looked up at me and said, "You know Blanch's ghost? I've seen her several times over the years too.".....boo!

Just a heads up...

An important notice to any guy within five years of retirement:

Within the next five years never, never, EVER answer your wife's request with "I will take care of that when I retire"! Listen closely when I say, "WIVES TAKE NOTES!!!!!"

My bucket list of things to do after retirement did not include marking things off a checklist. However, each time I made the above referenced comment Debbie wrote it down. As I neared my much longed for retirement she put her notes into a nice, user-friendly, concise TO DO LIST and posted it on the refrigerator door. I ignored the list as long as I could do so without encountering too much conflict but after a month or so of retirement I started receiving little nudges (I refer to these as nagging) about when this or that would be completed. There are items on the list I swear I never promised to tackle but since her attorney is much more driven than mine, I have been reduced to working according to the terms of the TO DO LIST. The only reason I have time to write today is the weather. Next up on my list is "Paint the House". It is raining so obviously it would be careless to work outside. My only point scored during the argument portion of the list making was that I can only do one thing at a time and until such time the next item listed is non-preferential and can not be addressed by management. That is all legal talk for "you can't make me do items 2 through 27 AND you can't nag me about them until item 1 is completed". Based on my progress so far, I will still be painting the house during the Christmas holidays. My dad always told me to never pay someone to do something you can do yourself. I got a quote for painting anyway.....$3500. I laughed (see earlier posts) and took on the project....I figure I'm making about thirty cents an hour....

Since I've had a lot on my mind worthy enough to share I may post again today....as long as it keeps raining.